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1. Lighten Up
Don’t be so serious that you can’t have a little fun. Chores and family
time don't have to be oppressive. Plan family meetings, outings, vacations
and game nights together. Give every family member a chance to voice his or
her opinion without interruption or criticism. Quit griping!
2. Do What You Say
Do your best to live up to the promises you make and the expectations
your family has of you. Parents have a right to expect their children to
help around the house – without getting any reward beyond knowing the
satisfaction of contributing to the good of the family. Kids have a right to
parents who are reliable and who will be there for them. If you say you love
your mom/dad/son/daughter, do your actions say it, too?
3. Put Yourself in Their Place
Parents need to try to remember – honesty! – what it was like when they
were teens. Times have changed, but basic human emotions, need, temptations
and integrity have not. Kids need to try to remember that their parents were
teens once – long ago -- but they lived through it, and learned form it.
They just might have some true wisdom and insight to share with you.
4. Don’t Put Yourself in Their Place
Every person is a unique child of God. It is unfair to think that
everything someone else does is a personal reflection on you. Your kids are
not you. Your parents are not you.
Parents: Achievements in school, in sports or on the stage are not a
fulfillment of your childhood dreams or vehicles to build up your
self-esteem. Don’t burden kids with unrealistic expectations.
Teens: You know your parents are not perfect. All parents make mistakes
and sometimes do things that embarrass their kids. Unfortunately, some
parents also commit crimes, hurt their kids or abandon their families. Hard
as it may be, you have to pray for them and not let them destroy your faith
in yourself.
5. Honor Your Leaders
Who’s in charge? Sometimes it’s not you! Teachers, catechists, coachers,
the DRE and youth-group leaders will, for the most part, do their very best.
Parents: If you undermine their efforts by questioning their decisions,
belittling their advice or telling your child they don’t have to comply, you
are giving your child plenty of ammunition against cooperation – which, in
the end, hurts both on you and your child.
Kids: If you complain about how boring or unfair the person in charge is,
you are cutting yourself off from whatever they are there to help you learn
or achieve. You may also be giving your parents a false impression of the
person, which is unfair to them!
6. Be Positive
Or, if you don’t have something good to say, don’t say anything.
7. What Do You Say?
Remember the magic words: Please and Thank You. And how about: I’m sorry;
It’s OK; and I love you? Don’t let yourselves outgrow the simple courtesies
that we teach the little ones. Teens and adults need to use them, too,
especially to one another.
8. Take Your Temperature
Everyone in the family is responsible, to some extent, for the mood in
the house. Periodically, check the climate in your home. Is it warm and
friendly, a little too cozy, chilly, frigid or hot to the point of boiling
over?
9. Listen Up!
When someone is talking, listen. It’s so basic, but often do you break
this commandment? Are your eyes glued to the television or computer screen
when someone is talking to you? Do you pretend you can hear with headphones
on? Do you listen to what the words mean, and try to understand the message
behind the words? Sometimes we know family members so well that we do know
what they are going to say before they say it. But maybe they need to say it
anyway. And you need to listen, anyway.
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by Anissa Melotte
Prayer isn't about words, it's about relationships. It's about our
relationship with God, and God's relationship with us. It's about our
relationship with our family and friends and their relationship with us. Prayer
is about how we relate and communicate in our relationships with God and God's
people. Prayer, like stewardship, can become a way of life for us if we take the
time to nurture our relationship with God, even in small ways. The following
suggestions may help to keep us aware of God's presence that is with us always,
as well as the needs of God's people all around us.
- When you hear a siren or see a fire truck or ambulance, say a prayer for
the person/s who has been hurt or is ill.
- When you're sitting at a red light, say a short prayer for the person in the
car in front of you (and in back of you if it's a long light!)
- When standing in line at the grocery checkout, say a prayer for those who
have no money to buy food.
- Park at the end of the parking lot, and thank God for your ability to walk as
you approach the door of your destination.
- Get a small notebook to keep by your bed. Each night before going to sleep,
think back on the day and write down one thing you are grateful for.
- Go out of your way to smile and greet people as you pass them in the halls at
work or school, or on the street.
- Tell your kids, your spouse or your dear friends that you love them!
- When you say to yourself, "Why me God?" take the time to listen for an
answer.
- Say a short prayer of thanks before and after every meal.
- Pick a family member or friend each day and say a short prayer for them as
you are brushing your teeth.
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Teach your child how to develop inner
motivation
At one time or another, most parents use rewards to
motivate their children. And there's no question that reward systems work. But
when the rewards stop, sometimes the good behavior stops, too. That's especially
important to remember when it comes to studying. Researchers have found that
students who are motivated only by the desire to get a good grade rarely do more
than the minimum they need to get by. However, when students are motivated by an
inner reward, they are more likely to stick with a task. Students with inner
motivation learn because they're curious. They retain what they have learned
longer, and they earn higher grades.
Here's how to help your child develop this inner
motivation:
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Start with his interests: Before he works on a
project, have him think about what he wants to learn
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Help him see progress as he works on a big task.
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Help your child share what he's learning.
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Give positive feedback, but encourage him to
praise himself for a job well done.
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Parent commitment at the time of enrollment is to be
a three-stewardship requirement, involving the following areas:
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WORSHIP-each family commit themselves to
regular Mass attendance
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SERVICE-all families are encouraged to
give volunteer service to school and parish. Families who are not able to
pay the full tuition goal are required to give volunteer service in one (1)
of the following areas:
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parish picnic or Oktoberfest
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help with hot lunch 10 times per year
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serve a full year on a Home & School
committee
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noon supervision duty 10 times per year
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organize a fund raiser
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help with bingo 10 times per year
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extracurricular activity
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other
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FINANCIAL-financial commitment to be the
total tuition amount or the family's fair share of the set goal and the
annual fundraising commitment set by the School Board.
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At the start of a new school year, parents make sure
their kids have school supplies. But research shows the most important "school
supply" is a dose of parent involvement. Researcher Charles Izzo followed
children from kindergarten through third grade in 27 schools. He found that when
parents did just a few simple things, their children did better in school. The
most crucial thing parents can do is support their children's school work at
home. From setting regular study times to encouraging children to do their best,
parents of the most successful children are partners with the school.
Parents should also..
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Stay in touch-Meet your child's teacher.
Let the teacher know when things are going well and when they're not. Write
a note, send an email or pick up the phone.
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Build a relationship-with your child's
teacher. Kids learn best when they feel that home and school are on the same
team.
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Come to school-Mark the date for Open
House on your calendar. Bring your child to Math Night. Every time you walk
in the building, you help strengthen the feeling you child has that "school
is important."
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You make many sacrifices to send your child(ren) to a Catholic school. You
trust that your child(ren) grow in the learning experience. There are many
things you can do to support KCSS in its efforts to maintain a positive learning
environment where students are encouraged to make good choices.
Some are:
- Teach your children socially acceptable standards of behavior. Help them
understand and believe that Jesus lives in each on of us.
- Teach your children to have respect for the law, authority, and the
rights and property of others.
- Teach your children to be accountable for their own actions and help
then to become self-controlled, well developed citizens.
- Know and discuss school rules with your children, and be willing to be
involved and cooperate with school personnel.
- Support faculty and staff in enforcing this discipline policy.
- Maintain and active interest in school work and activities.
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Give Your Child the Right Kind of Homework Help
Homework is a vital link between home and school. Teachers give homework to
help children understand and review class work. Parents find out what their
child is studying by being involved in homework. But being involved does not
mean doing your child's homework for him. That will give the teacher a false
reading of your child's progress. Plus you'll prevent your child from building
confidence in his ability to do the work himself.
Here are some ways to support your child's learning:
- Provide a place in your home where it's easy for your child to study and
do homework. It should be quiet, well-lighted and free from distractions.
- Set a regular time for homework. Family routines, which include homework
time are related to higher performance in school.
- Don't allow your child to rush to finish homework so she can go outside
or play on the computer.
- Show interest in your child's assignments. Ask questions. Let your child
know you are available if she has questions. Give suggestions when needed.
- Avoid giving rewards for good grades. External rewards can decrease a
child's motivation. Instead, focus on the value of learning for its own sake
rather than just to please you.
- Show that you appreciate your child's efforts. When she brings home a
test, tell her that her hard work shows.
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Attendance is Directly
Linked to Achievement
Parents who let their kids miss a lot of school are
setting them up for school failure. Researcher Mary Frase tracked students who
dropped out of high school. One thing that nearly all of them had in common was
poor attendance. One of the most important things you can do as a parent is to
get your child to school on time every day. The start of a new school year is a
time to help your child make this a habit.
Follow these tips:
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Enforce a regular bedtime for your child.
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Make sure your child is organized so she can get
out the door with what she needs.
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Remember that everything you add to a schedule
means something must be taken away. For example, if you add lots of before
and after school activities, you take away time for you child to read, play
and study.
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Some kids can handle a busier schedule. But if
youth sports leave your child too tired to do homework or to get up in the
morning, it's time to cut back.
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You have the unique opportunity to have a positive
affect on your child's future. The development of homework patterns begins in
childhood and shapes how your child will work throughout life. It is important
that you help your child establish good homework habits that he can take with
him well into adult life.
Here are eight things you can do to set a healthy
homework tone:
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Find and appropriate place to do schoolwork.
Select a well-lit, comfortable, quiet spot in your home, and make that a
designated homework area.
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Find a quiet area without distractions. A place
without a television, radio or stereo is optimal. Make sure this spot is
away from others who are not doing homework.
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Wither find a place that is well-lit or create
an area with a lot of light. Poor lighting creates eye fatigue.
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Make sure the area has the necessary supplies
close at hand.
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Establish routine study hours. Find a good time
to do homework, and have your child study within this time frame every day.
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Encourage your child to do their best work and
to get it done on time. Do not do the homework for your child. If there's
something they don't understand, guide them through the directions in order
that they reach the goal themselves.
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Praise your child's efforts-not only when he or
she brings home a good grade, but for small efforts as well.
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If your child is not doing his or her homework,
listen to why and then communicate firmly that you expect him or her to be a
responsible student and get his or her homework to school when assigned.
Remember, what you do to create a homework policy in
your home today will set the tone for how your child works tomorrow.
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What should you do if your child is being
bullied?
Victims of bullying often develop serious problems.
They feel isolated. They have a hard time adjusting socially. Some can't control
their anger. Research shows children who are bullied often have academic
problems, too. You can find additional resources
on
the web.
Talk with your child and ask questions. If she's
being bullied:
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Tell her she made the right decision to tell you
about the bullying. Encourage her to give you details.
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Empathize with her feelings. Assure her it's
perfectly normal for her to feel sad, angry or embarrassed.
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Find out if she's done anything to stop the
bullying. Has she reported it to the teacher? Encourage her to do so.
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Guide her in handling the bullying situations.
Tell her to walk away, and avoid or ignore the children who tease her.
Suggest she stand near an adult when possible.
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Help her build new relationships. Find
activities for her outside of school where she can meet new friends. Invite
new friends over after school.
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If possible, volunteer for school activities
such as playground patrol or field trip chaperone.
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Discuss the bullying problem with your child's
teacher.
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Don't confront the bully or the bully's family
yourself.
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The Importance of a Good Night of Sleep
Studies prove that even one more hour of sleep can help your child. His brain
will work better. He'll be more alert and able to pay attention at school. He'll
remember material with greater accuracy.
Following are some guidelines to help your child get the recommended nine
hours of sleep each night:
- Monitor Caffeine. Don't allow your child to have caffeine within four
hours of bedtime. Experts say children shouldn't have more than what's in a
12-ounce soda per day.
- Get your child active and outdoors. Exercise and fresh air help children
sleep better.
- Follow a schedule. Try to have the same times for meals and snacks,
homework, games,. TV and other recreation, and bedtime.
- Create a bedtime routine. Take a bath, put on pajamas, brush teeth, read
a brief story. Review something positive from the day. Then, lights out.
Make your child feel safe. Put a night light in his room. Leave his door
slightly open. Tell him you'll check on him.
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The Importance of a Good
Breakfast
Your child needs to be alert all morning during
school or his/her performance will suffer. One way to achieve this is to see to
it that he/she gets a good breakfast in the morning before he/she is sent out
the door. Providing your child with a steady routine is helpful and important.
When a child is rested and fed, he/she is ready to get involved in daily
activities. Proper food is necessary for good health. Food provides the
nourishment a body needs in order to grow.
If your child ever tells you that he/she is draggy
during the late morning, it may just be that he/she needs a bigger breakfast.
Please see that your child always gets a good,
nourishing breakfast. Examples of healthy breakfast foods are listed below.
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Carbohydrates give energy: fruits, breads, rolls
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Proteins are building blocks for the body:
milks, cheese, eggs, lean bacon or Canadian bacon
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Minerals help form bones and teeth: milk, dried
fruits
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Vitamins help make you grow: milk, fruit juices,
breakfast, cereals, bread
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